Wedding Ideas

If you want you can say “NO”

We know that in our life there are three critical moments: birth, marriage, death. But one essential point is the application to marry. Marriage marks the request of a fundamentally existence of a man (or woman, if applicable).You are in trouble is the request doesn’t please your lover Women imagines this time in the most romantic way possible and if possible if it s original is better. It is a moment of great intensity … when all the attention is pointed on them, all eyes and thoughts are channeled to it, because you cannot ignore a request to marry you off, if you happen to be present. “It” is now “the center of the universe”. No one and nothing must spoil the moment.
Marriage comes from a primary human instinct. Perhaps this is also why so many survived hundreds of years and is found in all societies and civilizations of the world. True, marriage offers phenomenal benefits both individuals and society, but is simultaneously a work that began to lose meaning.

The divorce rate has risen worryingly in recent decades. Individualism emerged to the surface, supported by personal rights considered inviolable, and empowerment of women. These things have really increased divorce rate and reduced the attractiveness of marriage. Many couples today prefer to live together without having a formal act which would have deep social and legal implications. There are many reasons why people do not want to get married. One is fear of divorce. Such separation can be caused by emotional or physical abuse, extramarital affairs, lack of money to maintain a decent lifestyle and those are just a few examples. Divorce is a traumatic experience for whatever perspective you look. Stress, suffering and bad things washed in public, many of them are divorced people who don’t want to remarry and are afraid to do the same mistake a second time.
Taking in consideration all these reason, but not only, when you are proposed by your partner, if you are not sure about how much you love your partner, if he is only an decorative object in you relation, if he/she is to possessive or obsessed of control, perfectionist or have some other personality disorders then you should have the power to say no. It is not a disaster, it doesn’t matter if people will speak about this weeks after weeks. You just have to think that it is a decision that you take for life, that it is about your happiness . Even if it sounds like a selfish gesture, and you don’t think about your lover feelings, think that it is better to be sincere both with you and your partner, rather to live a life in pain in sadness.

Is he ready to say “YES?”

Men love their freedom and independence. For some, marriage is the end of freedom and the beginning of the life chain. For others it is a mistake that they do. And most people believe marriage is an exchange at which turning the eternal bond. Marriage is perceived by men as loss of sense of freedom, the obligation to have a single partner of the opposite sex, taking of responsibility and anxiety of a downturn. There could be several reasons why men are afraid to do so.

Lack of confidence in women

Although it seems rather unusual, because usually men are those who betray the trust of women, things can stay way. Many times, men started off their life with some jaundice in childhood or adolescence. Ideas that are plugged into their head by the experimented ones who already went through life and experience. Even if these ideas do not have a solid base, but are pure and simple myths, many men live with these ideas . There is also a second factor : that everything is beautiful is desirable. So then men are afraid that many others will appear in the competition better than they, and they will be removed, pushed aside. This is where the frustration and jealousy.

Entourage, friends and lifestyle

A great deal of influence it can have on an individual, is the entourage. Men usually supported celibacy, in turn why women are at the opposite pole and search for marriage and security. As long as friends will sit around, man will not find a stable partner. In the group of friends, man can be easily influenced by the views of others.

Lack of freedom

If the women compromise in this regard in one way or another, find that men have very big problems adjusting in this regard. Eternal adventurers, when they will feel the smallest spiral of freedom, they will escape. Numerous times, they suffer of the syndrome called “invasion of privacy”. The idea that someone could share everything with them shivers down. Plus, they do not support questions, explanations and personality crises of women.

But the reality is…
Fear of marriage is based on an irrational fear, the refusal to face the responsibilities and hardships of life in two. This fear is more met in the men who prefer to love without formalize the relationship . Marriage anxiety is manifested by direct rejections, but with different stated reasons that men bring to the foreground if possible to postpone marriage. Studies of couples of friends last year showed that the rate of marriage among young people is still down from previous years. The main reasons advanced by men are: lack of trust in relationships unstable and insecure, lack of a stable job.. To these it can be added the lack of socio-cultural and intellectual status congruent with partner status, lack of harmonious relationships with parents and future in-law that would endanger conjugal relationship, lack of free time that was used. But the strongest reason is that once married you have to be limited to a single partner, and this is the equivalent of monotony, the decrease in interest towards the beloved one.

To young to get married

Since we were small we dreamed to get married, to you find the Charming Prince, the man that you dream to get married in a white princess dress, to have a beautiful house and at least one baby. As we mature, however, for most of us, the idea about marriage is changing and we prefer to finish school and have a career before to get married. For others of us, marriage remains a priority and we are in a hurry, even if all those around us say we are too young for marriage. In fact, how young is too young for marriage?

What does tradition says? In the United States and beyond, the couple must have at least 18 years before they could marry without parental consent. It appears that up to 18 years is not considered mature couple legally to marry. A 1946 Gallup study showed that the consensus of the population is the ideal age for marriage for women is 21 years. The same study, repeated in 2006 show that age 25 is considered ideal for women and 27 for men. As the purpose of marriage has changed from that of tlove procreation and friendship, the average age at which women marry has started to grow increasingly. We no longer focus on sexual maturity, but rather on the emotional, psychological and even financial aspect.If most of our parents are married by the age of 25 years, now it hardly happens. Marriage is postponed as long as possible, many preferring cohabitation.

There are many couples who already have one child or more, and do not want to legalize that connection between them. Motivated often by not seeking more excitement around their wedding, in itself, meaning money thrown out the window, and the relationship they already have is perfect, even if that act is missing. And, fundamentally, the act of marriage does not alter the relationship between the two partners , relationship that it is perfect without the act. May simply have phobia of marriage certificate.
Most of young people say that marriage is no longer fashionable, we like to have other perspectives in life and for sure other models :a partnership life , celibacy or, even, marriages without children. We have become modern, we want to have fun as much and no time for marriage. The studies done lately, shows that partnerships occupy several percent, against marriage. Longitudinal studies carried out over the years have shown that women who got married teenagers , when they had the age between 16 and 19 years were three times more likely to go to divorce than women who marry after 20 years. This is usually because girls expectations about marriage and couple life are not realistic, but based on planned since childhood fantasies about the ideal couple and family life.
We are in a continuous agitation, we came to believe that there are more important things in life, than to go through the marital status or tiring to organize a party with dozens of relatives and friends. Now, the career has come to occupy a much more important place than marriage. For many women, the job is the main concern, neglecting many times, sentimental life. We feel fulfilled if we have a successful career and no longer have time for marriage! For convenience, we do not realize that these two things can go very well together.

Don’t belie

Our need to feel someone close, to feel protected, afraid to escape from routine and monotony or fear of change normality where we are, we are most often tied us to a person which can no longer love much or at least no longer love you as before. None of it because you must not impatient. Is to be expected that if you marry after ten years of a relationship not to feel so much passion and fire all other feelings at maximum intensity. However, other changes that will stay With the passing lady. Then you will have as your home, well-being, you make plans to bring along a baby, you will think how to decorate them room and so on. Many say that is normal, the passion disappears with the passing years, that remain in the exchange condition, which is also a kind of love and respect.

If you don’t feel is the time to get married or if you don’t want too, then you have to tell your partner what you think even with the risk of losing him. It is more honorable to speak out loud and to be sincere rather to lie your partner. Just imagine how you will feel if he is not sincere and straight with you, trying only to avoid the answer at the big question. Maybe you are too afraid of doing this step, so you must speak with your partner, he will understand you because he might feel the same. Maybe you are still studying and for this reason you don’t want to get married before finishing your studies, tell him again. Maybe you realized that you don’t love him so much, that you just got used with his presence and you want something more like passion and true love, tell him. Maybe you don’t see in him a good provider for you and your future children. Tell him, tell him, tell him about all this kind of thoughts if they exist!!!

The fear that something might change, the relationship might alter because cohabitation does not give you peace. It is something new, already begin to share everything. All pluralize, there is not any more ” now is “us”. Everything you do from now on has to do with “us”, the life of the couple. Already you are not one entity, but you form a whole. But you have to see the full glass, to think of how many beautiful things you will live together. Imagine mornings spent in two, cool or warm evenings, meals taken together every day, napping on TV … all these things you can do now will color the life freely.

Are you ready for the big commitment ?

Finally he proposed you!!! You are so happy, the ring is gorgeous and everybody know the big news. But after all this finish and you have a moment of thinking , something is not right….you feel overwhelmed .Even if you have expected this moment all your life, you feel a bit strange. Maybe because until now it was just a princess dream, but now it is real and things are more and more serious and you are afraid.
Did you do the correct step? Are you ready to say yes? You decided the best?
You spend time together and nothing would stop you to do so. You had made plans, you love, actually, you just waited for this moment . But suddenly, suddenly, something happened and you are put on the thoughts. To be marriage the milestone between childhood and adulthood?
Fears before marriage are normal for both women and for men. The fact that in our minds are all sorts of anxieties about the couple life let you think if you made the perfect choice. Questions like: “if I fail?”, “If later I will change my mind?”, “If I am not love him any longer ?”, “If don’t understand?”. Even the most enduring love go through these changes before the big moment. Moreover, it is only natural. We’re cutting the feelings of the most complex and colorful, so it is natural that such fears to appear so one hand, and the other. Fear of the unknown, especially if you have not lived together before, fear that you have not done properly, that you are not ready emotionally, financially or any other reason, will give a few headaches before the big event. But stay calm! Marriage is not nearly as complicated as it is said. Living alongside the beloved one is a unique experience, but must be aware that in life the couple must exist and compromises. This is essential for family harmony.
Our need for affection, for feeling somebody close to us, the fear of changing or the fear that you may not love your partner after a long period of time, all those things are normal. But you don’t have to feel anxious, you have no reason, it is natural to be afraid of unknown situations, but once you get through your fears , you will feel so happy, like you’d never had those “black” thoughts.
The first thing that you ask yourself is” do I really love him?” This question is as normal as could be. You don’t have to panic, the best thing to do is to relax and have some moments of inner silence, some moments just for you when you could put in balance the things that you love or hate at your partner, how does he makes you feel, how does he behave with you, is he your soul mate? Only when the balance tilt to the positive pole , then you are ready for the big commitment.